Fanciful Fancies
by last-suicide-note
Summary: Draco and Hermione develop a...erm...connection. but its on rocky grounds. can they make it?
1. Of Beer and Turkeys

This may seem like a sort of awkward place to start a story, but hey! It's MY story.

Disclaimer: hmm….. not mine….. isn't that obvious enough? Amateurs should not be allowed to be confused with JK Rowling. ESPECIALLY when it's me.

OK, OK. I'll shut up now.

Chapter 1: Of beer and turkeys

Draco Malfoy walked through the empty hallways, his expensive shoes clicking against the cold marble. He reached the Head Dormitories, said the password. He walked in, and his jaw dropped to the floor. The whole room was a complete mess. Couches were overturned, lights had been smashed, and random stuff had been tossed every which way. It looked like a tornado had gone through the room, and as he looked around, the tornado seemed to have had a name. Hermione Granger. There, off to the side, sat a very dazed looking Hermione, with a strange little smile on her face.

"Granger! What in the name of Merlin happened in here?!" Draco shouted.

"Oh, I dunno. I think that you know……ummm……haha……I can't tell you…really… the…uhhh…that…" Hermione trailed off, and started rapping her head with her wand which had been lying next to her, and giggling like a giddy 2nd year. Her words were slurred, and she was swaying around dangerously, despite the fact that she was sitting.

"Jesus, Granger. You're drunk!"

"Well, that's nice to know." She replied. But she wasn't listening.

"GRANGER!" Draco roared.

"Is that my name?" asked a very confused Hermione.

"Heavens. Do you know who I am?"

"No……"

"Malfoy."

"Oh… Really?"

Suddenly, Hermione jumped up, and started running around. She leapt off the upside down couches, and started waving her arms around frantically.

"LOOK!" she screamed. "I'm a flying turkey!"

"Granger, turkeys don't fl-"

"BAWK BAWK BAWK!!!"

"Oh god."

"Come on! Join me! Join me Malfoy!"

"I'm fine thanks." Replied Draco, who in truth, was starting to get kind of scared. This was completely out of nature for her to be so…crazy. In fact, it was totally out of nature for the goody-two-shoes Gryffindor to drink.

Then, as if struck by something invisible, Hermione went limp mid-air, and collapsed to the floor.

Draco stood where he was, shocked, and then, started sniggering. He strode calmly over to the figure lying on the ground.

"Granger…?"

No answer.

"Granger!"

Still nothing.

"GRANGER!" he shouted at the top of his lungs.

Silence.

"AGH!" He turned her over, and brushed her messy mop of hair aside impatiently, and there was Hermione Granger, fast asleep.

OK. That was kinnda awkward, and I guess kinnda OOC. 2 pages. I'll do better next time. Lata.

shortsandshirts


	2. A Plan Wrong Went

Fanciful Fancies: chapter 2

A Plan Wrong Went

A/N: ok. So I don't own Harry Potter. I think we've made that clear enough. Although I would like it if I did. Just imagine… all that money. The fame. The name… But, its always nice to dream. Sigh… anyways!

Review Shoutouts:

TheManWhoLetTheBoyLive: Thanx……It's nice to know that you only read it cuz you think my name is cool…… But I think I can overlook that. So, thanks for saying my story is good.

Flavagurl: Thanx a TON for reviewing. I've read a few stories where Hermione was drunk, so I decided to add a little bit of my own touch to the 'Hermione-is-drunk' theme.

HanyouGirl16: Yea. It's weird and I guess creepy. Hermione usually never drinks, but hey! That's the beauty of Fan-Fic. I can make up anything I want about the characters. They could be druggies, angels, god, the devil…… right. Umm…. But thanks for reviewing and voicing your opinion.

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Draco was, nonetheless, amazed.

'NEVER, would I have imagined that goody-goody Granger would drink.' He thought to himself.

He unceremoniously dropped Hermione from the precarious position they were in. Draco Malfoy with Hermione Granger's head in his lap. Hmmm…

Her head landed with a hollow 'THUNK!'

He just smirked in evil delight.

He made his way to his room, and slammed the door shut.

Suddenly, his face turned down into anger and disappointment.

'Damn! I should have taken a picture. She's still out there though… And that mess…' that smirk found its way again.

He rummaged through his stuff and found Colin Creevy's camera. He had snuffed it from the little brat the other day.

'Handy'

He cautiously opened the door, and peeked around. Without making sure Hermione was still downstairs, he dashed out, skidded to the top of the stairs, held up the camera, and, 'CLICK!' the light bulb flashed. Stars were dancing in front of Draco's eyes, and he hurriedly made his way back to his room, dazed, yet gleeful. He shut his door, locked it, and sat in a chair at his desk. The picture was coming out, and he held it up triumphantly, waiting for it to dry and develop.

Finally, his masterpiece was finished! He held it up, looked at it-and did a double take.

'Where's the mess?! Where's…Granger?!' he thought wildly.

Instead of a picture of a ruined room, and an unconscious Granger, Draco held the image of a perfectly clean and organized Common Room, and……no Granger…!

"Dammit!" Draco yelled. "Dammit Dammit Dammit!!!"

Suddenly, "Drakie? Is everything alright? Can I come in?" came a sickingly sweet voice.

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So ummm…. Yea. That's the chapter. Very short. Very uneventful. Very boring. But at least the ending was sort of a cliffie. I had major writer's block. Too much going through my head. But, feedback would be welcome, and I think that some ideas would be enjoyed. Like, how I can improve, or what-not. Thanx.


	3. stress causes white hairs

Despite the fact that I am oh so busy, I decided to type up the chapter. Because to be honest, the ending of the 2nd chapter made me excited… I dunno why. Like, the little cliffie I added was a last minute impulse that I added. And I know how usually people type up the whole story before they post anything, or whatever. But, me! I write while I post. So basically, everything that's in the story is stuff I came up with on whim. So, thank you for wasting your precious on reading this atrociously boring story.

Disclaimer: We go through this process like, 50 million times. So I've decided that I'm not going to be writing anymore "disclaimers". Because, honestly I don't think that I'll get sued for not putting one up.

Oh, yes. And thank you to you wonderful people who reviewed.

TheManWhoLetTheBoyLive: It's fine. You could call me a fat fag-bitch, and I wouldn't care. Actually…I would… Never mind.

Flavagurl: It would be funny if it was a drunk Hermione, but I decided to dampen the excitement, and make it…NOT Hermione. Teehee…

Onwards we go brave soldiers!

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Chapter 3:

Draco sighed. You could NEVER, EVER miss that voice.

He sat as still as he could, and just prayed to Merlin, that the person standing outside his door would leave ASAP.

KNOCK KNOCK!

"DRAKIE! I KNOW YOU'RE IN THEIR HONEY BUNS! OPEN UP THE DOOR AND LET ME IN!"

Draco gritted his teeth together, and stuffed his fist in his mouth. He HATED the name Drakie. And Honey Buns… Where'd she get that name form? (A/N: It was form an inside joke between my friend and I. I thought it was funny… It's ok if you don't laugh though…)

"DRAKIE DRAKIE DRAKIE DRAKIE DRAKIE DRAKIE!!!" she yelled persistently.

"GOD DAMMIT WOMAN!" he yelled-on accident of course. He just couldn't sit in there calmly and silently while she was out there yelling her head off. ESPECIALLY when she was calling him 'Drakie', loud enough for the whole world to hear.

He strode over to the door, undid the bolt, and yanked it open roughly.

"WHAT?!" he yelled, obviously agitated.

"Hi!" she said flirtatiously, while batting her eyelashes like a hummingbird flaps its wings.

"What do you want?!"

"I just wanted to say hi," she said, starting to look nervous and embarrassed.

"GOD!" he shouted. (A/N: They're all doing a lot of yelling aren't they…?"

"Excuse me?" she questioned, not knowing who god was.

"You stupid bitch! You came all the way up here, and pounded on my door, shouting that ridiculous name loud enough to wake Dumbledore, JUST TO SAY HI?! HOW DUMB CAN YOU GET?!"

"Well…ummm…" she stammered.

"Fuck. Get out before I strangle you with my bare hands!" he threatened.

She whimpered, but he felt no remorse.

"Fine." She exclaimed, lifting her chin up timidly, trying to look brave.

Draco just stood there, wondering when she would leave.

"Fine" She repeated again, apparently at loss to say anything else. That's how slow her mind worked.

"Fine…what?" he asked. Getting more impatient by the second.

"FINE!"

He sighed. This was never going to end, was it?

"Will you get out…NOW?!" he said.

"FINE! But you'll regret saying NO to Pansy Parkinson."

"Yea. Whatever. Just get out."

"Well, I'm going to have fun, while you're stuck up here, in this boring room. So in the end, I got the fortune!"

What the FUCK was she talking about?!

"Yea, whatever. You're probably just going to go fuck another guy." He shot back.

Her face turned bright red.

"No! I am NOT!" but he could tell she was lying. She never was really good at that…

"Sure…" he said, unconvinced.

"HMPH!" she said, turned around, and stomped down the stairs, and out of the portrait, with her nose held high in the air the whole time.

"Slut," he muttered, turning back around, and closing his door.

He swore he heard someone next door laughing.

"STUPID STUPID STUPID!" he yelled as loud as he could, and kicked the bed.

"OW!" he exclaimed, hopping around the room on one foot, holding the other one, his hair in his face.

'This is really fucked up. My whole LIFE is fucked up.' He thought angrily.

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Dammit. This whole STORY is fucked up. Gosh. Please review, and tell me how I'm doing. I never really did have a high confidence level, so I'm starting to re-think this story. Gosh-darnett!!! Waiting patiently.

lastsuicidenote


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